MGTOW men. We are back today, and I hope that you are doing well as we continually move into more hoodie wearing weather. I know that I’m looking forward to it. Thus, if you guys have those ideas for a Sunrise Hoodie, whether it’s the type of hoodie, color, design or lettering on the hoodie, I want to hear it.
Obviously, I have the purple and yellow as my logo colors for Sunrise Hoodie, but I’m open to branching out to other sunrise related colors, including light blues, reds and oranges – all of which reflect the colors of the sunset. I’ll get into how I came across this name in a future video – I know that I’ve explained it briefly, but maybe the background story will help explain it more for you guys.
I put my hoodie up because of many things, and one of them is emotional cheating. Today’s video is going to be focused on cheating – and it’s not the cheating that the media talks about, Cosmopolitan talks about, or your ex-girlfriend talks about. It’s emotional cheating. Cheating that doesn’t involve a one-night stand with someone that you meet on a road trip, business trip or at a party when your relationship isn’t going so well with your man. It’s a different type of cheating, and it’s just as damaging.
That form of cheating is emotional cheating.
I’ve been on both ends of emotional cheating. I’ve been on the side of the guy being cheated on and I’ve been the guy that is helping the girl cheat on her boyfriend through an emotional affair.
The Emotional Affair
Many relationships are broken down today, not because of the new opportunities for physical cheating, but now with the opportunities for emotional cheating. It’s actually defined in a Wikipedia article as “a relationship between a person and someone other than (their) spouse (or lover) that affects the level of intimacy, emotional distance and overall dynamic balance in the marriage. The role of an affair is to create emotional distance in the marriage.”
If you delve into the deep and dark abyss that is the gynocentric mainstream media, emotional affairs won’t be defined as serious and it won’t be associated with the breakdown of relationships. This is a lie.
Studies have shown that men’s extramarital relationships were more sexual and women’s more emotional. This same Wikipedia article cites a book titled “Casanova’s Chinese Restaurant”, stating that an emotional affair is always associated with passion, and that the two cannot be separate. The composer in the book, as it is stated, says that “an unlikely couple experiencing love at first sight, denies that they are having an affair:
“You can have a passion for someone without having an affair. That is one of the things no one seems able to understand these days…one of those fascinating mutual attractions between improbably people that take place from time to time. I should like to write a ballet around it.”
This is a lie guys, and I am making this video today to warn you guys that relationships shouldn’t just be avoided with women today because of a fear for being cheated on sexually, but because of emotional cheating. It can happen anytime and any place.
In the age of dating sites, Tinder, social media and even text messaging, in which you can reach out and contact thousands if not millions of people at anytime. And often times it can begin in a seemingly harmless way like “Unlike my spouse, this person really understands me…you really get me. When I speak, you actually listen.”
This can begin when you guys are passing each other in line at the supermarket, in between sets at the gym – maybe it is someone at work that you occasionally see in the breakroom. It can happen anywhere, and of course it seems like that person can listen and really understand you, because you have to realize that when someone has seen the same things, heard the same things and dealt with the same issues for years. Everyone has a certain cap when it comes to how much they can listen, and it’s not unlimited. And when this point is reached it is often reached because there isn’t reciprocation between the emotional sharing in the relationship.
Often, the female dominates it and the man is emotionally fried. Thus, ushers in the emotional cheating and emotional affairs. There are three points that I want to bring up today because of this, all underneath the notion that emotional cheating is rife today and that all fall underneath my continual argument – you’re always at the gallows. You never know when the eject button is going to be hit and relationships are too much of a risk today. You can’t forecast the future because of the impact of social media, technology and feminism.
- Destroys emotional and sexual intimacy
- Increases fighting. There is now a barrier created between you and the person
- Lastly, this has never been easier. Just a simple text a day.
Destroys Emotional and Sexual Intimacy
So, with my first ex-girlfriend, she became extremely close to a certain friend that she worked with at the YMCA and that we had classes with. He would always be third-wheeling and I thought he was a great guy. He was very military like and he was respectful, although she grew closer to him through her time working with him each day and slowly, since I didn’t always show up at parties that they were hosting and I was working crazy hours as a journalist student and journalist, he began to supplant me.
Not that I care about things like making it “social media” official, or “Facebook Official” as they say, but she had a picture of him and her on her Facebook page for about two-thirds of our relationship. They stayed close friends after I broke up with her and she quickly moved on to a new guy, whom she broke up with me for. But, that whole time they stayed tight and they would be going out together. Whenever I was gone on weekend trips for baseball for example, she would be there with him, taking snaps to pass the time.
Tragedy struck and he passed away. I can’t believe it, and I’m still in shock that it happened. It was awful, although the impact that he had made in her life was evidence of the power of even a friendship with another male in a female’s life when she is supposedly in a dating relationship. The guy that she is currently dating was a football player in college, not very there intellectually and likely isn’t very communicative at an emotional level. Our friend that passed away was all of those things, and for the next year it would be impossible for her to move on from him based on the conversations that we had about his passing.
Her pair-bonding abilities with her current boyfriend have been obliterated from the emotional bond that she created with him, and I don’t know if she will ever be able to move on from that. I know that our emotional connection began to be fried as things went on, and if you don’t have an emotional connection, in a relationship that is sexual, you can’t have a sexual relationship.
–When I was the one participating in the cheating–
I was on the other end of things in my next relationship. She was burnt out of her current man who literally did everything and more for her, broke his back, quite literally in construction for her, but he was overbearing. He was too involved, and that’s the tightrope that you end up walking in these relationships. You don’t know if you’re being overbearing or if you’re not being there enough, you truly can’t know, but from what she said, he was there too much – he was too involved. Thus, comes me. The love bombing phase.
I remember distinctly the first weekend that we started talking he had purchased tickets for a concert as well as a hotel room and I was on the other end of the line as she was in the hotel room. He was sleeping. Looking back, I shouldn’t have been there. I shouldn’t have been talking, because if she is willing to be talking on the phone with me while he paid for these things, then it wouldn’t be a relationship that would work as this represents emotional cheating. Pair-bonding is destroyed as your interests and your mind’s energy is distracted. Too often we believe that we can chase two rabbits and that we can have two masters. Our minds are based on one thing, and this severity of emotional affairs is strong and they can happen anywhere, at any time. There is an invisible barrier that is now created. Soon, this person, this woman, begins to resent you – and you have no idea why.
Increased fighting – there is now an invisible entity between you and her
One of the major symptoms of emotional cheating is increased fighting. The article from Wikipedia, again don’t knock me, I’m still in school and Wikipedia is a real bro, states:
“When a person becomes emotionally involved with a third party, they may begin to discount their primary partner, or to view the new person as all good and their committed partner, which will lead to increased fighting and strain on the relationship.”
Low and behold, with my ex, after beginning to have an emotional affair with me, shortly thereafter she began to fight and eventually breakup with her boyfriend. What begins to happen is the counseling app effect. The person that is the emotional confidant and becomes the counseling app so to speak. She sees that person as her counselor and the purpose that you have is her counselor.
If that’s how she perceives you prior to the relationship, there is no way that your relationship with this person is going to work either. As more and more men become available and the idea of scarcity becomes more and more prevalent in men’s minds today thanks to social programming, social media and our general lack of control of our environment and situation, more men are going to be willing to sell out as the counseling app today. More men are willing to take that second-class citizen role as they don’t deem that it is really sacrificing anything in their lives.
When you begin to reveal secrets and very sensitive information to another person, you begin to value that other person in a way that you’re not valuing your current spouse and that would normally be reserved, just for that current spouse. This creates a natural divide between you and that spouse. More and more you begin to devalue anything important that you once possessed with that person. It’s destructive and manipulative.
Lastly, emotional cheating is rampant
Men, if women are becoming more sexually available today with the tools of Instagram, Tumblr, Facebook, Twitter, YouTube even and definitely Tinder and Snapchat – if this is happening and you’re becoming less valuable and you have less stake in their lives because they are able to get the type of satisfaction they’re looking for, it doesn’t matter what it is, then what level or percentage of emotional cheating in relationships do you think that we are at now? An awfully high level. Men and women alike.
When sex is given the almighty label and that’s the only valuable and sacred thing in a relationship, and now that is being destroyed by our own licentious minds and relationships, emotional cheating is going to be viewed as harmless men. Even posting images to Instagram, Snapchat and Facebook that are of yourself, food you’re getting, her after a makeover, getting her hair done, going to the gym in her yoga pants – all of these things are posted in the effort to elicit a response from someone – an emotional response that will get her up and get her stimulated. Because, as a man, you can only provide that so long in the digital media age when some random strangers following her on Instagram will be able to provide the emotional needs on many levels, replacing you.
It can start with one text, and it can end with sex, but regardless of what ends up coming of it, it usually acts as a death sentence for a relationship. Just like we spoke about cohabiting yesterday, this is just another example of a death sentence that dating in the modern age with bring. Emotional cheating is not treated seriously and if that’s the case and that’s how we have framed this, then there is yet another land mine for you MGTOW men to lookout for and to reason with in making your decision about going for a relationship or not. For me, in the boyfriend-app culture, I’d rather opt out.
So, ponder this guys. Share your stories of when you’ve either been the one she is confiding in, you’re the emotional cheater or you’ve had it happen to you. I’m sure that if you’ve been in one relationship, you’ve had this happen to you at a certain extent.
This MGTOW movement is certainly ramped up by the powers of social media. Never discredit that in MGTOW, it’s a pillar behind the reasons for this development.
So men, as always, I encourage you to reach out to me, share your ideas, share your requests or just to send your story my way. These videos are fueled by your input and I take it seriously. Sunrisehoodie@gmail.com is the place to go, or on Twitter at @sunrisehoodie.
Hoodies up, hoodie is out.