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Throughout college, and it is still this way, working out and lifting weights was one of my favorite hobbies. Even when I don’t have free time to spend I always find time to lift. It clears my mind, adds to my health and gives me a continual goal. Without having goals the body, mind and spirit falters.
But, in the eyes of one of my exes, working out was an addiction and something that she’d likely say I enjoyed more than her. At times my working out was almost equated to me cheating.
This is not uncommon and a lot of men can relate to this situation, especially in the area of working out, as for me it was a daily endeavor.
The general truth is, men have hobbies that they are devoted to on a far more consistent basis than women, who simply don’t. The majority of a single woman’s life and time is centered around procuring a mate. This includes getting the right wardrobe, getting the right tan, following the latest beauty YouTubers and coping the rose gold iPhone. If a woman has a hobby, the majority of the time they are generated by the end goal of attracting the eyes of another male, or even impressing their friends. Many females adopt the hobbies of males in dating relationships…enter the girl wearing the Green Bay Packers or New York Knicks jersey to join her boyfriend in “fandom.”
I suppose working on makeup and hairstyles can be a hobby, but it’s surely a saturated hobby within the world of females.
It raises the question…why don’t women have hobbies? Women aren’t thought of as being hunters, carpenters, gamers or fishers at nearly the same rate as men.
A particularly comical article I found in the Huffington Post from 2010 came from a freelance writer who has written for the Guardian, The Independent and Marie Claire – a cesspool of publications that surely aren’t going to lend themselves to much red pill thought. This main graph from this article reads:
“Like most men my husband seems to be able to find the time to do the things he enjoys.
How do they do that?”
She goes on to say how she was “too lazy” to take any of the sports she played in high school very seriously, right after mentioning how she was about to smack her husband for calling her out for not having any hobbies. Just saying, but your husband probably didn’t make up this observation out of thin air.
The key in this article is that she confesses that everyday activities are enough to satisfy her.
“The other things I find satisfying would probably be considered more housework than
hobby: cooking, putting flowers in vases, reorganizing my wardrobe.”
Women do have hobbies that involve creation and building organic content although the scale is proportionally smaller. For the women that don’t have hobbies, look out for these red flags.
They’ll Keep You From Your Hobbies
When you aren’t engaging in a hobby or never have taken up a hobby seriously, looking at someone devoting so much time to an activity that doesn’t garner any financial gain may seem foolish. So foolish that they may convince you to stop the hobby or shame the hobby.
Losing a hobby can lead to a lack of fulfillment, dissatisfaction and actually resentment for that person that caused you to lose the hobby – whether you realize that person caused you to lose the hobby or not.
It can express a lack of intrinsic drive and motivation
Being internally motivated as opposed to externally motivated is a far more consistent and healthy form of motivation. External motivators, when brought down to our most animalistic levels, would include outrunning a dangerous wild animal or hunting night and day to quell hunger pains. This type of motivation engages our adrenals, which is not sustainable and doesn’t involve activities that include innovation.
Invention and artistic creation may be initially fueled out of external necessity but internal motivation is the key element behind a renaissance.
Long story short, if she doesn’t have any hobbies, the majority of her efforts are going to be based around the basic survival instincts, which involves working merely to provide food, shelter and to help support any children or other family members. Another motivator may also be procuring a mate for the sake of procreation or self validation, which is another survival based motivator.
When internal motivation isn’t present I’ve found that a person is relatively uninteresting and won’t create for him or herself in a way that allows for more personal financial freedom down the road.
She may focus too much of her attention on you
If she doesn’t have a hobby or a history of having any hobbies, she will have far more time for you and will expect to get more satisfaction and fulfillment through you in her life. This increases the amount of time that you have to invest in to her and the amount you have to do to please her and keep her satisfied.
With hobbies to invest energy and time into on the side, she is able to divert attention away from you which is one of the healthiest things within a relationship and points to a more balanced and long term relationship that won’t burn out.
She is likely more promiscuous
If a female’s sexual marketplace value is high and she has been seen by many people as pretty or sexy, then she will naturally invest more time into those activities to keep her looking hot. This recognition triggers the major pleasure neurons within her brain, so why not continuing to work on beautifying myself?
With this type of attention on her, why venture into other hobbies to get satisfaction? Plus, the same concept applies with the concern that she is going to focus more of her attention on you – now she is going to rely more greatly on procuring male attention through her looks that any other constructive activity.
Not all women completely ignore hobbies and solely depend on going to bars, gossiping and watching T.V. to fulfill their entertainment needs. But, noticing the impending danger of dating a girl without any hobbies is a subtle way to steer clear of a potential train wreck.
Below are links to a few articles and related Reddit posts regarding this topic.
Thanks again, and stay tuned for more red pills.
Reddit – I recently broke up with a girlfriend…
Huffington Post – Why Don’t Women Have Hobbies
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