I feel guilty for admitting this, but this article was triggered recently by an excerpt that I read from a DailyMail post on their Snapchat story this past week.
I took a screenshot of this post, detailing how Kim Kardashian and Kanye West were having a conflict because Kanye was not good at taking her social media pictures during a trip in Japan.
There is no need for me to analyze how idiotic the statement, “Kanye West is a bad Instagram husband,” is. What the heck is an Instagram husband? This better not emerge as a new word in the Urban Dictionary lexicon.
I also find this ironic considering Kanye’s lyrics in Vic Mensa’s song, “U Mad”, in which Kanye writes, “She ain’t really bad, she a photo thot / I should hire this bit*h, she so dam* good at Photoshop.”
Considering he was with Amber Rose as well, Kanye clearly has a thing for the Instagram thots.
1) You’ll never be able to give her enough attention
The reason social media has garnered so much popularity is because it provides the instant gratification that the drug of affirmation generates for us on a 24/7 basis. If you are not able to supply your girlfriend or wife with enough attention, physically or even emotionally, she can always take a filtered photo of her looking good and receive comments and likes to get her through the day.
Even if you do provide her with a lot of attention, it may become stale to her. Instagram is the outlet to reignite this fix. This brings up another rabbit hole I could go down regarding the “damned if you do and damned if you don’t” situation that occurs in giving a girl attention. Too little and she’ll stray, too much and she’ll push you away. Theoretically.
I’ve had a relationship where one of the main issues was the amount of attention that I was giving. During the first half of the relationship I received criticism for spending too much time with her, being too attentive and subsequently giving off the impression that I was being needy. Things flipped in the second half of the relationship, when the lack of attention that I thought would remedy this issue became another separate barrier in our relationship.
Ultimately, with her knowing that Instagram is there, she can come to realize that you are dispensable in her eyes as Instagram is more satisfying for her ego.
2) You have to compete with millions of other men, even if they live across the world
I don’t care if you have a chiseled frame, a well-paying job and a fly whip, there will always be another guy that has it better, has more and ultimately is more appealing to your girl. No matter what. It’s just a fact of life. There will always be people with less sexual market value appeal than you and those with more sexual market value.
In December of 2016, mediakix.com noted that 600 million people used Instagram. The atlantic.com wrote an article, “Why are More Women Than Men on Instagram”, stating 58 percent of Instagram’s users are women.
Take those numbers and you’re competing with around 2.5 million men on the Gram, and the ones on the Gram likely have something to flaunt – otherwise they wouldn’t be on that narcissist fest. Good luck competing with that.
Today, women can come into immediate contact with more men than they could in their entire lifetime if you’re comparing things to almost anytime prior to 2000. That’s a scary thought, so you’d better stay on your constant A-game or else the dark, tall, strong, charming millionaire could always slide into her DMs.
3) It’s a reflection of her priorities and her interests
I think there are positive reasons for using Instagram. It can be a good tool to stay updated on certain information that might have a purposeful impact on your life.
But, if your girlfriend is addicted to Instagram, whether it’s posting pictures of herself, building her perfect life through the site or just following other people, it means she’s likely not concerned with the areas of life that will have a substantial impact on your relationship and potential marriage.
Money, career, investing and interpersonal communication are likely going to take second fiddle to the world that she is building on Instagram. Our value as people far transcends our activities and physical image, and Instagram is one way to create a schema where it seems all that matters are those trivial things. This can lead to dissatisfaction, a feeling of insufficiency or make you as the partner appear insufficient.
Just check the relationships page on Reddit…you’ll have a lot to commiserate with if this is you.
Also, this may introduce the notion that she is always looking for a man on deck.