MGTOW Red Flags – Don’t Date a Girl Without Hobbies

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Throughout college, and it is still this way, working out and lifting weights was one of my favorite hobbies. Even when I don’t have free time to spend I always find time to lift. It clears my mind, adds to my health and gives me a continual goal. Without having goals the body, mind and spirit falters.

But, in the eyes of one of my exes, working out was an addiction and something that she’d likely say I enjoyed more than her. At times my working out was almost equated to me cheating.

This is not uncommon and a lot of men can relate to this situation, especially in the area of working out, as for me it was a daily endeavor.

The general truth is, men have hobbies that they are devoted to on a far more consistent basis than women, who simply don’t. The majority of a single woman’s life and time is centered around procuring a mate. This includes getting the right wardrobe, getting the right tan, following the latest beauty YouTubers and coping the rose gold iPhone. If a woman has a hobby, the majority of the time they are generated by the end goal of attracting the eyes of another male, or even impressing their friends. Many females adopt the hobbies of males in dating relationships…enter the girl wearing the Green Bay Packers or New York Knicks jersey to join her boyfriend in “fandom.”

I suppose working on makeup and hairstyles can be a hobby, but it’s surely a saturated hobby within the world of females.

It raises the question…why don’t women have hobbies? Women aren’t thought of as being hunters, carpenters, gamers or fishers at nearly the same rate as men.

A particularly comical article I found in the Huffington Post from 2010 came from a freelance writer who has written for the Guardian, The Independent and Marie Claire – a cesspool of publications that surely aren’t going to lend themselves to much red pill thought. This main graph from this article reads:

“Like most men my husband seems to be able to find the time to do the things he enjoys.

How do they do that?”

She goes on to say how she was “too lazy” to take any of the sports she played in high school very seriously, right after mentioning how she was about to smack her husband for calling her out for not having any hobbies. Just saying, but your husband probably didn’t make up this observation out of thin air.

The key in this article is that she confesses that everyday activities are enough to satisfy her.

“The other things I find satisfying would probably be considered more housework than
hobby: cooking, putting flowers in vases, reorganizing my wardrobe.”

Women do have hobbies that involve creation and building organic content although the scale is proportionally smaller. For the women that don’t have hobbies, look out for these red flags.

They’ll Keep You From Your Hobbies

When you aren’t engaging in a hobby or never have taken up a hobby seriously, looking at someone devoting so much time to an activity that doesn’t garner any financial gain may seem foolish. So foolish that they may convince you to stop the hobby or shame the hobby.

Losing a hobby can lead to a lack of fulfillment, dissatisfaction and actually resentment for that person that caused you to lose the hobby – whether you realize that person caused you to lose the hobby or not.

It can express a lack of intrinsic drive and motivation

Being internally motivated as opposed to externally motivated is a far more consistent and healthy form of motivation. External motivators, when brought down to our most animalistic levels, would include outrunning a dangerous wild animal or hunting night and day to quell hunger pains. This type of motivation engages our adrenals, which is not sustainable and doesn’t involve activities that include innovation.

Invention and artistic creation may be initially fueled out of external necessity but internal motivation is the key element behind a renaissance.

Long story short, if she doesn’t have any hobbies, the majority of her efforts are going to be based around the basic survival instincts, which involves working merely to provide food, shelter and to help support any children or other family members. Another motivator may also be procuring a mate for the sake of procreation or self validation, which is another survival based motivator.

When internal motivation isn’t present I’ve found that a person is relatively uninteresting and won’t create for him or herself in a way that allows for more personal financial freedom down the road.

She may focus too much of her attention on you

If she doesn’t have a hobby or a history of having any hobbies, she will have far more time for you and will expect to get more satisfaction and fulfillment through you in her life. This increases the amount of time that you have to invest in to her and the amount you have to do to please her and keep her satisfied.

With hobbies to invest energy and time into on the side, she is able to divert attention away from you which is one of the healthiest things within a relationship and points to a more balanced and long term relationship that won’t burn out.

She is likely more promiscuous

If a female’s sexual marketplace value is high and she has been seen by many people as pretty or sexy, then she will naturally invest more time into those activities to keep her looking hot. This recognition triggers the major pleasure neurons within her brain, so why not continuing to work on beautifying myself?

With this type of attention on her, why venture into other hobbies to get satisfaction? Plus, the same concept applies with the concern that she is going to focus more of her attention on you – now she is going to rely more greatly on procuring male attention through her looks that any other constructive activity.

Not all women completely ignore hobbies and solely depend on going to bars, gossiping and watching T.V. to fulfill their entertainment needs. But, noticing the impending danger of dating a girl without any hobbies is a subtle way to steer clear of a potential train wreck.

Below are links to a few articles and related Reddit posts regarding this topic.

Thanks again, and stay tuned for more red pills.

Reddit – I recently broke up with a girlfriend…

Reddit – Askmen

Huffington Post – Why Don’t Women Have Hobbies

 

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MGTOW: Red Flags, Warning Signs and Green Lights

MGTOW – The Elusive Unicorn: Red Flags, Warning Signs and Green Lights

What’s the difference between a red flag and a warning sign and what do green lights look like if you’re still looking for a nawalt or are hoping a close friend of yours to finds one?

If you’re not already subscribed to the TheRedPill thread on Reddit, you should definitely go over to Reddit and sign up. Beyond the community that the thread provides, it gives you red pill doses on the regular to keep yourself grounded as the gynocentric world continues to lob bombs on us from all angles.

Here’s a link to the Reddit post that I am referring to, titled: The lengthy red flags, warning flags, green flags list. It’s pretty lengthy and is a great starting place for new MGTOW followers or those curious about the MGTOW movement. It’s summative of many things to look out for in women such as what type of parents they had, their spending habits, how they talk about people behind their back or even how they text and communicate casually with you.

I bring up this thread because today’s article is centered around the differences between what I’ve coined as red flags, warning signs and green flags. If you’re going MGTOW then there doesn’t appear to be much of reason why these three things should be of concern to you. Red flags, warning signs and green lights have a lot more importance when you believe you are on the hunt for a NAWALT or unicorn.

Before I delineate the various red flags, warning signs and green lights for everyone, I will quickly define each based on my understanding.

Red Flags: Negative traits, behaviors or life situations that can disqualify a woman from being a potential dating prospect because of the harm that they can cause in their life, your life or that of their children.

I’ve already been talking about red flags recently and have discussed two of them, one of which was about a woman who is addicted to social media and the girlfriend or wife that is constantly comparing you to an ex or another male.

Some other common red flags with woman are:

  • That they’ve dated and had sex with a laundry list of people
  • They spend frivolously
  • Have multiple credit cards and debit cards
  • Sleep in perpetually
  • Insist on routine gifts like flowers, food or makeup
  • Continue to have side conversations with other male “friends”
  • Have had an abnormal hair style on many occasions
  • Speak poorly of most people
  • Gossip a lot
  • Don’t have close friends
  • Don’t speak with their family
  • Isolate you from others
  • Look down on your hobbies
  • Don’t encourage your dreams
  • Don’t respect authority
  • Engage only in trivial conversation
  • Has to always be extroverted and social
  • Has more empathy for animals than humans
  • History of drug use and drinks alcohol heavily
  • Creates drama
  • Craves attention

The list is nearly endless and is relative to the type of person you are and the type of woman that you would be looking for. The main difference between a red flag and a warning sign is that a red flag is a current issue that has already manifested itself in the person that you are considering. It’s not something that is festering or eventually may bear its head five years into marriage. It is currently present and should be avoided, with almost no exceptions

Warning Signs: An indicator based on a current or past circumstance that may hint at the development of a red flag.

Warning signs don’t immediate disqualify a woman from being a potential candidate, rather they raise your attention and make you cautious about this person. Think of the tornado analogy. A tornado watch means there are meteorological indications that a tornado will be created, while a tornado warning means the tornado has been spotted. A warning sign is essentially the tornado watch.

Often times warning signs are created by situations that this person cannot control, thus you can’t blame the person for having an issue or having baggage. Rather, take note of it and factor it in HEAVILY into how you move forward with this person. On this Reddit post I saw some things like “having only guy friends”, “using powerful words in the wrong context” or “highly OCD” as being referred to as “warning flags”, or warning signs. I would deem these things red flags as they are current issues and aren’t necessarily created by uncontrollable circumstance.

The main warning signs that I would point to based on my definition are:

  • Having a distant father
  • Growing up in a tumultuous home
  • Being sexually, physically or emotionally abused as a child or adolescent
  • Having little to no responsibility growing up, whether it was not having a job or having to pay for anything at any point
  • Being an only child
  • Having few experiences that helped shape her:
    • Not playing sports
    • Little to no travel
    • Limited exposure to other people and/or ideas
  • Being raised in an isolated community

Another warning sign that crossed my mind for consideration was a history of having mental health issues or a familial history of such problems. These things can be remedied although they may be a sign of other problems such as an isolated environment, poor exercise or health habits. All of these things exacerbate mental health issues in addition to the potential for issues arising from clinical or chemical depression.

I don’t like being too critical of these things, as men are also susceptible to all of these issues. I am simply bringing them up from an objective perspective as you want to look out for your best interests, not belittle another person.

Green Lights: Qualities or characteristics that would encourage pursuing a relationship with that person. These can include habits, beliefs, behaviors, goals and more.

Here is a list of the most encouraging green lights that I can think of:

  • Has goals that are both short term and long term
  • Follows healthy habits on a consistent basis
  • Is concerned with eating healthy and exercising
  • Has empathy and is concerned with being altruistic
  • Will check in with you and is conscious of other people’s feelings
  • Has passion for things
  • Can engage in conversation with a variety of people
  • Saves more than she spends
  • Respects your time
  • Has respect for your habits, suggestions and ideas
  • Appreciates traditional gender roles and acting upon them
  • Enjoys intellectual conversation and can discuss large issues not just domestic topics
  • Respects your sleep schedule
  • Has respect for your personal time

Some red flags, warning signs and green lights will hold greater or less weight to you depending on what you value and your own personal characteristics. It’s up to you to determine what is of value to you, but I know I didn’t conceptualize their verity prior to my dating years. After having two failed relationships and taking the red pill I can now see that things like red flags and warning signs hold true quite often.

MGTOW Red Flags – Constantly Comparing You to Her Ex and/or Other Males

This is a pretty broad topic. I’m sure that anyone who has dated has experienced this, although each instance of being compared to a girlfriend/wife’s ex or male friend comes with a different severity.

I’ve been compared to my ex anywhere from how I walk her across a busy street to my attractiveness (or lack thereof) or to the fact that I don’t sell marijuana and can’t run the streets like her ex boyfriend can.

I was inspired to go into this topic because of a Reddit post titled, “sick of her bs”. This post was appeared on the relationships section of Reddit and isn’t necessarily a MGTOW-related entry, but it brings up some interesting ex and male friend comparisons that I’m sure we can relate to.

Here are some of the Reddit user’s gripings:

1) When I got a raise at work, she said “Oh wow, so you’re almost making as much as [ex boyfriend] Nick, now!”

2) When I got a new car, the first time she rode in it she said she “thought it would have leather seats, because that’s what Trevor’s [male coworker] car had.”

3) When I came home from the gym ecstatic about breaking my personal benchpress record, she said “soon I bet you’ll be as strong as [male friend] Steve!”

Here’s a link to the Reddit post

Thus, this list of red flags and subsequent issues is hardly representative of all that you may run into in a grass is always greener girlfriend.

What are the Issues?

1) Usually she’s got some real inflated expectations for you

Men and women view the purpose of a relationship far differently. While both men and women want to have a supportive partner to help them achieve self-actualization, women are biologically wired to relate the quality of their relationship and partner to their own personal value and success in life. This fosters disproportionately high expectations for you as a boyfriend or spouse.

The logic of comparing you, her current partner, to someone she left because of a myriad of reasons is pretty laughable. Good luck winning when the bar is set well above the Olympic high jump record.

  • You’ve got a great apartment, her ex has a great house
  • You’ve got a solid career in business, her ex has a more lucrative law career
  • You give her continual affection, her ex bought her flowers more frequently
  • You give her too much attention, her ex dismissed her on random…which is somehow desirable
  • You have a nice physique, her ex turned down opportunities to model for American Eagle

None of these things may be true, but she can play them off as true out of pure strategy to get you to make changes to yourself.

2) She isn’t encouraging you to improve yourself for any reason other than for her gain

Losing the ability to build yourself up and better your life for the sake of your own betterment as a human is probably one of the biggest reasons to end a relationship. When you’re improving yourself to become more like the ex’s that your girlfriend or spouse had, you certainly should break up.

What’s going on here is that she is essentially building an ideal prototype of the guy that she wants. At the end of the day, enough would never be enough though, and you’re always going to be insufficient in some way.

Move on, you’re going to regret all the time that you tried to be more demonstrative, demanding, chivalrous, drunk, manly or whatever for the sake of what you thought would satisfy her.

Dating is not a design your own character World of Warcraft character building game.

3) It’s usually a sign of hypergamy

If you’re reading this, you likely know about hypergamy. For those that don’t know what hypergamy is, hypergamy is loosely defined as marrying or dating someone for the sake of the status that it affords you.

Throughout human history we’ve confused the idea that we marry out of love, romance, compatibility and other Hollywood-esque qualities. The truth is rather that we’ve always married out of status concerns.

The difference today is the rampant rate of divorce, hookups and the opportunities social media has provided to do so makes our hypergamous tendencies in relationships that much more dangerous.

The walls from being considered a social pariah for cheating or having a divorce have been obliterated, creating a greater itch to be hypergamous. I believe that women have different levels of hypergamous tendencies. The ones constantly comparing you to her emotionally abusive, but amazing in bed, ex is a sign that hypergamy is alive and well in her.

4) You’re probably going to be compared to James Dean or Prince Charming

This is a topic for a whole other blog post. The Hollywood/Disney fan girl will never be satisfied, it’s just something that the feminazis/liberal culture at Disney have cultivated.

The main issue of being compared to movie icons and cultural icons that have emerged from controlled environments that media exist in, is that it doesn’t reflect reality. They’re unrealistic and isolated environments devoid of any of the little idiosyncrasies that a girl would loathe. Also, movies don’t show the doldrums of life where the girl may begin to get bored of the Zac Effrons of the world.

Ultimately, it’s like comparing apples and oranges. It’s not fair or realistic either.

5) She has insecurity issues, and fears insufficiency in your eyes

One way we handle insecurity in certain situations is thinking of people, jobs or environments of our past where we felt belonging. We look at these things with rose colored lenses, even if the experiences were marred by frequent abuse and trials.

For whatever reason she is attempting to reaffirm her own image in your eyes by bringing up positive qualities about her ex. This can lead to other things like resentment and fear in your relationship, which needs immediate attention.

Being constantly compared to your girlfriend or wife’s exes is a symptom of some underlying issue or insufficiency in her confidence at the time. I believe that the most powerful reason identified in this post is number five, “she has insecurity issues”. Talking about our past is a way to give yourself validation in an otherwise uncertain situation. It’s a way of protecting ourselves against discreditation amongst our tribe.

But, the list surely doesn’t end here.

In the next part we will be looking at MGTOW red flags and how they compare with what are called warning flags and green flags.

MGTOW: Red Flag – The Social Media Addict

I feel guilty for admitting this, but this article was triggered recently by an excerpt that I read from a DailyMail post on their Snapchat story this past week.

I took a screenshot of this post, detailing how Kim Kardashian and Kanye West were having a conflict because Kanye was not good at taking her social media pictures during a trip in Japan.

IMG_0512.PNG

There is no need for me to analyze how idiotic the statement, “Kanye West is a bad Instagram husband,” is. What the heck is an Instagram husband? This better not emerge as a new word in the Urban Dictionary lexicon.

I also find this ironic considering Kanye’s lyrics in Vic Mensa’s song, “U Mad”, in which Kanye writes, “She ain’t really bad, she a photo thot / I should hire this bit*h, she so dam* good at Photoshop.”

Considering he was with Amber Rose as well, Kanye clearly has a thing for the Instagram thots.

Red Flags:

1) You’ll never be able to give her enough attention

The reason social media has garnered so much popularity is because it provides the instant gratification that the drug of affirmation generates for us on a 24/7 basis. If you are not able to supply your girlfriend or wife with enough attention, physically or even emotionally, she can always take a filtered photo of her looking good and receive comments and likes to get her through the day.

Even if you do provide her with a lot of attention, it may become stale to her. Instagram is the outlet to reignite this fix. This brings up another rabbit hole I could go down regarding the “damned if you do and damned if you don’t” situation that occurs in giving a girl attention. Too little and she’ll stray, too much and she’ll push you away. Theoretically.

I’ve had a relationship where one of the main issues was the amount of attention that I was giving. During the first half of the relationship I received criticism for spending too much time with her, being too attentive and subsequently giving off the impression that I was being needy. Things flipped in the second half of the relationship, when the lack of attention that I thought would remedy this issue became another separate barrier in our relationship.

Ultimately, with her knowing that Instagram is there, she can come to realize that you are dispensable in her eyes as Instagram is more satisfying for her ego.

2) You have to compete with millions of other men, even if they live across the world

I don’t care if you have a chiseled frame, a well-paying job and a fly whip, there will always be another guy that has it better, has more and ultimately is more appealing to your girl. No matter what. It’s just a fact of life. There will always be people with less sexual market value appeal than you and those with more sexual market value.

In December of 2016, mediakix.com noted that 600 million people used Instagram. The atlantic.com wrote an article, “Why are More Women Than Men on Instagram”, stating 58 percent of Instagram’s users are women.

Take those numbers and you’re competing with around 2.5 million men on the Gram, and the ones on the Gram likely have something to flaunt – otherwise they wouldn’t be on that narcissist fest. Good luck competing with that.

Today, women can come into immediate contact with more men than they could in their entire lifetime if you’re comparing things to almost anytime prior to 2000. That’s a scary thought, so you’d better stay on your constant A-game or else the dark, tall, strong, charming millionaire could always slide into her DMs.

3) It’s a reflection of her priorities and her interests

I think there are positive reasons for using Instagram. It can be a good tool to stay updated on certain information that might have a purposeful impact on your life.

But, if your girlfriend is addicted to Instagram, whether it’s posting pictures of herself, building her perfect life through the site or just following other people, it means she’s likely not concerned with the areas of life that will have a substantial impact on your relationship and potential marriage.

Money, career, investing and interpersonal communication are likely going to take second fiddle to the world that she is building on Instagram. Our value as people far transcends our activities and physical image, and Instagram is one way to create a schema where it seems all that matters are those trivial things. This can lead to dissatisfaction, a feeling of insufficiency or make you as the partner appear insufficient.

Just check the relationships page on Reddit…you’ll have a lot to commiserate with if this is you.

Also, this may introduce the notion that she is always looking for a man on deck.

MGTOW – Addison Russell Accused of Cheating, Domestic Violence and Lying on the Insta

On June 8, the wife of Chicago Cubs shortstop and 2016 World Series champion, Addison Russell, went to Instagram to notify the world of alleged domestic abuse.

melisa-russellMelisa Russell made a vague statement that accompanied a picture of her on the beach, enjoying herself and giving the impression of newfound freedom.  

The couple have only been married for one year and had their first child in January of 2015, although things have seemed to go south even as he has accrued an estimated earnings of $4.2 million per spotrac.com.

As you can see in the post above, Melisa Russell followed up her initial post with the statement, “for everyone who has a problem with my post, it’s freedom of speech.”

It is freedom of speech and these “allegations” may be true, but it is yet another example of how terrible social media has become, especially in terms of relationships, whether they be dating or even marital relations.

To talk about disrespect though, posting a call for help on Instagram that involves personal information about their relationship might as well be a sign of the nail in the coffin on the couple’s relationship.

Social media has created a platform of keyboard egoism and protection that has the power to divide couples and divide people. There really is no purpose is posting this on Instagram. Go ahead and speak to each other, your parents (they are both only in their early 20s) and then go see attorneys privately if need be.

This whole case is laced with immaturity. We will see who has to suffer, but it likely will be Addison and their child as he has to live through a divorce through his future.

MGTOW Mistakes

Having the child

I would be willing to bet that if Addison didn’t have the child with Melisa in January of 2015 that the two would not have gotten married. The couple wasn’t married at the time, and I know from my experience as a recent 21-year old that I’ve made some questionable relationship decisions that I look back and shake my head at.

Addison was probably looking to protect his public image as he eyed a future of public scrutiny as a projected perennial all-star for one of the most prominent sports organizations in the world. Thus, they shacked up.

They may not have been compatible or learned how to handle the fact that they’ll be separated for much of the year as Addison travels throughout the U.S. for the grueling MLB season. 

Striking out on big $$$

If Addison continues to do marginally well for the Chicago Cubs he could be expected to earn a huge payout going forward. With tens of millions in the bank by age 30, Addison could likely attract 99 percent of the female population in any of the 27 MLB cities.

Now alimony and child support could suck out of his big league contract long after he hangs up his cleats.

Learn the ways of Jaromir Jagr

Screen Shot 2017-06-15 at 10.29.56 AM

Potential future hall of fame hockey player, Jaromir Jagr, has played hockey since 1988 and has never married or had any children. He has the second-most points in NHL history and has never had any headaches of familial issues in 19 years.

Above he is pictured in bed with a model who tried to extort $2,000 from Jagr by threatening to post a picture of the two having sex. He replied, “I don’t care.” This answer is a microcosm of how you should handle women who view you as a resource.

I believe that his longevity as a player has been helped by not having to support a family and knowing that he can be shipped off to a new team at any time and not have to work through the headache of moving his whole family.

A lot of MGTOW commentators from Sandman to forums on Reddit have lauded Jagr for his MGTOW ways. Now he can sit on his money and still marry a chick in his 20s if he so pleases.

As a Cubs fan, it’s difficult to see this happen to someone who you root for. He’s likely experiencing the emotional effects of this conflict, hitting just .209 with 43 strikeouts in 54 games, posting three home runs and 19 RBI.

Last year he hit 21 home runs with 95 RBI and belted three home runs and 13 RBI in the 2016 playoffs.

Sources:
Addison Russell’s Twitter Status
Bleacher Nation Article
Addison Russell Gets Called out on Twitter – The Big Lead